These are my favorite quotes from the past week, not just from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.
Once Upon a Time
Zelina: Let’s just say, when the Dark One offers you onion rings, don’t eat them!
Regina: There’s a difference between not knowing something and not *wanting* to admit it.
Cat: I put her in that helicopter. If anyone should feel guilty, it’s me. Not that I do.
Cat: The world is full of so much noise and snark. Much of it we generate. Today, why don’t we elevate this city’s level of discourse instead with a photo essay of all the people who spent their holidays volunteering at soup kitchens and shelters. Let’s see if we can’t bring some attention to those organizations.
Kara: I think that’s a great idea.
Cat: Well, of course you do. I pitched it. Thanksgiving sells. Liberals love to feel guilty, so let’s just squeeze as much juice out of those turkeys as we can.
Jane the Virgin
Magda: I think the Russian red-haired lady in the kitchen is trying to poison me.
Narrator: For those of you keeping track at home, that’s now three children for Rafael and zero sex.
You guys are about as funny as I thought you’d be.