These are my favorite quotes from the past week, not just from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Narcos
Javier: This cat is DEA. Mark my words, you will get justice.

Tata: What good is having all the money in the world if you can’t go home?

The Last Ship
Miller: Now we’re all immune, ass hole.

Cdr. Chandler: People need to celebrate, even in the worst of times.

Chasing Life
Sarah: We can’t choose who we love, but we can choose how we respond to those people when they do self-destructive things.

Hand of God
Bishop Bruce Congdon: When you’re pushin’ God, it’s okay to have fake tits, you just can’t be full of shit.

Anne: We might never get what we earn on merit, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get what we deserve.

Playing House
Maggie: What happens in the ladies bathroom stays in the ladies bathroom.

Maggie: Why are you dressed like Shaft?
Mark: Why am I dressed like Shaft?! Are you hunting wabbits?

Mark: These two are free to go.
Emma: I know I’m free! My heart can’t be caged! I know why the caged bird sings and you can suck on this one!
Maggie: Alright. Alright.
Emma: What did I just say?

You’re The Worst
Gretchen: What’s the address here?
Jimmy: You don’t know the address?
Gretchen: No.
Jimmy: You live here.
Gretchen: Who knows their address?
Jimmy: People. Kidnapped children. This dog I saw on Dateline who rides the bus to the park.

Lindsay: You go home tonight and you dress up real slutty, and you do butt stuff with your boyfriend. For all of us who let love die by becoming ordinary. Do it for the sweater people, Gretch. The sweater people.

Sam: Do I look like a Fitbit?! I don’t give a shit about your sleep!