These are my favorite quotes from the past week, not just from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.
Cat: Drunk at 9 a.m., that’s the last time I have breakfast with Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Winn: I got some maaad sowing skills.
Jane the Virgin
Jane: Don’t want to brag, stopped peein’ my pants yesterday. Hey-oh!
Dr. Wells: Everyone loses someone they care about. The real test of character is what you do once they’re gone.
Gilda: This is our head of R&D. As far as you know, her name is Dr. Irving.
Major: Then, as far as I know, can her first name be Julius?
The Bastard Executioner
Wilkin: You understand that giving birth to a pillow neither serves the shire nor yourself.
Oliver: The world is a much more complicated place than most people are comfortable believing.
You’re the Worst
Lexie: Conventional and scary, hell yeah. But the death of fun? Not necessarily! To be a slave to an idea of coolness is why some of your friends never grow and in the end are actually less themselves and, counter-intuitively, live less authentic lives than the buyers-in.
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Sarah: Know thyself, because what else is there to know? People hide secrets. Time is a lie. The material world can disappear in an instant. It has and it will again.
The Vampire Diaries
Enzo: I thought you were leading us to a secret passage.
Bonnie: You watch too much Scooby-Doo!
Damon: Glad to see you’ve boarded this train to Crazy Town, Bonnie Bennett. I was getting lonely all by myself.
Hiro: Save our son. Save the world.
Brennan: Watching the Philadelphia Whosits play hockey is not a sexual stimulant. And after games, you’re often exhausted from shouting at the umpire.
Booth: It’s a referee.
Brennan: Well, not to mention your bad mood when they lose.
Booth: Yeah, but when the Philadelphia Flyers win, when they score and they win, okay, that puts me in a very good mood, and that makes what I do *there* that much better. Boom! Go Flyers.
Caroline: You have a bright future ahead of you, but first you need to find yourself the right kind of woman.
Aubrey: You askin’ me out?
Caroline: Cher, you couldn’t handle me.
Sherlock: Justice is like an orgasm: it can never come too late.
Morland: You don’t look well.
Sherlock: You look as spry as ever. My compliments to the virgins whose blood you bathe in.
Morland: I see the opiates haven’t dulled your wit.
Sherlock: Nor has old age withered yours.