Lethal Weapon

Quotes of the Week: October 9-15

These are my favorite quotes from the past week, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Supergirl
Alex: Your cousin smells terrific.

Clark: Being Kara is just as important as being Supergirl.

Clark: Up, up?
Kara: And away!

Lucifer
Lucifer: Goodness, gracious, great balls of fire.
Chloe: Lucifer.
Lucifer: I mean, I’ve heard of hot pants, but this really brings new meaning to the term “fire crotch,” doesn’t it?
Chloe: Lucifer!
Lucifer: Wait. I have more. Smokey Bobinson. Weekend at Burnie’s.
Ella: His burning bush?
Lucifer: Oh. Very good. That was actually me, by the way, so don’t tell anyone.

Lucifer: I punish because I’m good at it. I love giving people their due. Makes me happy.

Conviction
Hayes: If you don’t want me to sleep with waiters from Mom’s campaign events, don’t hire hot ones.

Hayes: Next time you want to check up on me, find a different spy, because I’m never sleeping with someone already in bed with my mother.

Timeless
Wyatt: An actor.
Lucy: Pretty well-known too. But his brother, Edwin, was literally the most famous actor in America. John never quite measured up.
Rufus: So, this is like if Donnie Wahlberg assassinated the president.
Lucy: Pretty much, actually.

The Flash
Barry: I’ve kissed Iris West twice, and I have managed to erase both times from existence!
Felicity: Yeah, I hate it when that happens.

Felicity: Everybody likes Barry Allen. You’re like pudding. Everybody likes pudding.

Jay: Are you just gonna take a do-over every time you make a mistake? Or will you live with them, and move forward?

Iris: Where ever you go, you’ll always be Barry, and I’ll always be Iris. We always find each other.

New Girl
Jess: You can’t be mad at these people.
Schmidt: But they were all horrible to me, Jess.
Jess: And that’s why you left. You created your own path. You changed cities. You made friends. You found your purpose. You met the love of your life!
Schmidt: I sure did.

The Real O’Neals
Jodi: I’ll make you a deal. I’ll do the modeling gig if you go out with VP Murray on a real date.
Eileen: And why would I do that?
Jodi: Because it’s National Coming Out Day. And if I can come out as someone who’s plus-size, you can come out as someone who’s got a crush on a thin man in Lycra.
Eileen: Of all the fabrics in all the world, he had to wear that one.

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Quotes of the Week: September 25-October 1

These are my favorite quotes from the past week, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

New Girl
Jess: Let’s get ready to Rodham!

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
Director Mace: There’s so much S.H.I.E.L.D. history that Agent Carter herself didn’t know it all.

Mack: Why? Why are you doing this?
Fitz: Because she’s turned her back on us, Mack! Because something terrible happened, and she didn’t want our help getting through it!
Mack: Slow down, Turbo.
Fitz: Well, we’ve all been through terrible things, all of us, and we’ve never turned our back!
Daisy: I…I’m doing what I need to do.
Mack: And it still affects us. Like it or not.

This Is Us
Kevin: What did I ever do those first two minutes without you?
Kate: Uh, you cried and you crapped a lot.
Kevin: Sounds about right.

Toby: I heard that Deadpool was her idea… or maybe it was Hamilton, I get those two confused.

Rebecca: Hey, how do you think we’re doing so far? At parenting?
Jack: I…
Rebecca: ‘Cause I think we’re at a six. On a sliding scale, one through ten, I think we’re at a six, and I think I’m being generous.
Jack: Bec…
Rebecca: Seven, fine, but only because there are three of them.
Jack: Baby, I…
Rebecca: And the thing is, I’m trying really hard to get us to a nine. Because they are cute kids, and they deserve nine-parents. And the thing is, I feel like I’m there, Jack. I feel like I’m operating at a nine. Because I do individualized lunches, and I do individualized tuck-ins for each kid so nobody feels gypped. And… when you’re home, and you’re you, you’re way better than I am. You’re a ten when you’re you, Jack. But you’re getting home later and later, and when you do come home, you’re…
Jack: Bec, what are you saying?
Rebecca: The drinking has to stop. You have to reign it in, baby, because I won’t have it in my house.
Jack: You won’t have it in your house.
Rebecca: I won’t! So, if it’s a problem, fix it. Be a man, and fix it. Because I’m done letting you lower our score.

The West Wing
Ron: It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t Gina’s fault. It wasn’t Charlie’s fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault, Toby. It was an act of madmen. You think a tent was going to stop them? We got the President in the car. We got Zoe in the car. And at 150 yards and five stories up, the shooters were down 9.2 seconds after the first shot was fired. I would never let you not let me protect the President. You tell us you don’t like something, we figure out something else. It was an act of madmen.

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