Lucifer

Quotes of the Week: October 29-November 11

These are my favorite quotes from the past two weeks, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Lucifer
Dan: Dude, I cannot deal with your weirdness right now.

The Good Place
Janet: Say “goodbye,” Derek.
Derek: Ah, good-bob. I hope we same place again very now.
Janet: His brain is wrong.

Eleanor: Girl, you are a messy bench who loves drama, and I am into it.

Will & Grace
Karen: Sorry I wasn’t here but, uh, come on, what the hell was I gonna say? She was my maid? She was my sparring partner? She was my best friend? You were my everything, Rosario Yolanda Salazar. You know, it’s funny. People keep asking, “What do you need? What do you need?” I need for you to not be gone. Here, honey, I want you to have something. It was my mother’s. Makes sense you should have it. Lord knows you’ve been eyeing it for years. Honey, I’m not going with you to the cemetery, so don’t get mad, okay? I just can’t watch ’em put you in the ground. I have to remember you my way. So, if it’s alright, I’m just gonna sit here with you for a while. Te amo, Mommy.

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Quotes of the Week: October 15-28

These are my favorite quotes from the past two weeks, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Star Trek: Discovery
Captain Lorca: Starfleet didn’t start this war.
Harry Mudd: Of course you did. The moment you decided to boldly go where no one had gone before. What did you think would happen when you bumped into someone who didn’t want you in their front yard?

Lucifer
Chloe: I’m not worried about Maze. I’m worried about Canada.

Maze: I’m great at dismembering humans. How hard can it be to fix one?

The Gifted
Kate: I’m sorry.
Marcos: That’s alright. You did something stupid for someone you love. Can’t say I haven’t done the same.

The Flash
Iris: I was engaged to somebody else.
Barry: He’s actually dead, too.
Therapist: Oh, you two have had to deal with a lot of trauma.
Barry: Eddie, and Ronnie…
Iris: A little.
Barry: My mom, H.R….
Iris: Not too much.
Barry: Laurel, Snart…
Iris: We’ve been to a few funerals.

Cisco: (to himself) You just had to fall for the girl in head-to-toe black leather, didn’t you?

Kevin (Probably) Saves the World
Yvette: The universe doesn’t care about happy endings.
Kevin: Yeah, well, I do.

The Good Place
Eleanor: Would someone’s foot really fly off their body like that? That was kinda cool…ethically speaking.

Eleanor: I’m your hottest friend! No, Tahani. I’m your nicest… No, Jason. I’m your friend!

Arrow
Curtis: If one of us spots Tarkov, we should have a signal.
Rene: Yeah, I was gonna go with something like, “I see him,” or maybe even, “Hey, over there!”
Curtis: It’s not terribly original, but effective.

Will & Grace
Jack: You are exactly who you’re supposed to be.

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Quotes of the Week: October 1-14

These are my favorite quotes from the past two weeks, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Outlander
Jamie: The pain of losing a child never leaves you.

Lucifer
Linda: I didn’t know they could grow back. Are wings like… body hair?

Lethal Weapon
Roger: Have you ever been finger-lingered?

Maureen: You didn’t bury your past in Mexico. Just a little piece of it.

This Is Us
Kevin: I need to prove to everyone that I’m the bigger man but, like, the funnier bigger man.

Kevin: You, Beth, you fell for the Manny’s game. Now you sit there and you just think about that for a second.

Kevin (Probably) Saves the World
Yvette: God does not stop existing based on what you believe.

The Good Place
Eleanor: Hey, Janet?
Janet: Hi, there!
Eleanor: Do you have something shiny Jason can play with?

Will & Grace
Will: He doesn’t like Madonna.
Jack: He should be beaten with a VHS copy of Evita.

19-2
Ben: When did you go soft?
Nick: Same time you went crazy.

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8 Returning Fall Shows…

Summer television is always fun (and if you did not watch The Bold Type, you should get on that), but I am very excited for my Fall shows to return. Here are the ones that I am most excited about.

1. Outlander, season 3 premieres September 10 on Starz, stars Sam Heughan, Caitroina Balfe, Tobias Menzes, Sophie Skelton, and Richard Rankin. At the end of season 2, Jamie was about to head into the Battle of Culloden, so he sent Claire and their unborn child back through the stones, where she was reunited with Frank. I have read the third book, I know what is going to happen (for the most part), and I am still so excited for this to start. Each season the story and performances get better and better.



2. The Good Place, season 2 premieres September 20 on NBC, stars Kristen Bell, Ted Danson, William Jackson Harper, Jameela Jamil, D’Arcy Carden, and Manny Jacinto. If you did not watch the first season of this show, go do it immediately. It is hilarious. I have now watched it three times. I do not want to ruin anything for anyone who has not watched it, but I am very excited to see how they move forward going into season two. I also just need more Janet in my life.



3. Lethal Weapon, season 2 premieres September 26 on Fox, stars Clayne Crawford, Damon Wayans, Keesha Sharp, Kevin Rahm, Michelle Mitchenor, Jordana Brewster, Johnathan Fernandez, Richard Cabral, Dante Brown, and Chandler Kinney. I have to admit, I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the first season of this show. I figured it would be a pretty cut and dry cop show, but it was a lot more fun. I am very much looking forward to more adventures with Riggs and Murtaugh.



4. Lucifer, season 3 premieres October 2 on Fox, stars Tom Ellis, Lauren German, Lesley-Ann Brandt, Rachael Harris, Kevin Alejandro, D.B. Woodside, Aimee Garcia, Tricia Helfer, Scarlett Estevez, and Tom Welling. Last season ended with Lucifer waking up alone in the desert having had his wings restored. The new season will pick up right where we left off. Lucifer is trying to figure out how he got his wings back, a human Charlotte is putting her life back together, and newcomer Marcus Pierce shows up as a Lieutenant in the LAPD. One of the reasons that I love this show so much is that it really leans in to the ridiculous premise of a crime-solving demon. What can I say? The Devil is charming and sexy.

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Quotes of the Week: May 28-June 6

Since the ATX Television Festival is starting tomorrow, my schedule is a little wonky this week. So, here are my favorite quotes from the past week and a half, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

The White Princess
Duchess of Burgundy: We are none of us fearless, ma fleur tremblante. But we are women and we do what we must do.

Lady Margaret: Men are weak. Swayed by beauty. Women must be stronger.

Lucifer
Trixie: You don’t have to speak in code. I can handle adult stuff.

Downward Dog
Nan: Is it a bad sign if I like my dog less because he’s into Kevin?

iZombie
Clive: How do you like old Earl now, ya damn dirty lich?

Blaine: That’s from an impotent proctologist, by the way. Enjoy!

Fargo
Sy: The world… the world is wrong.
Esther: What are you sayin’, huh?
Sy: It looks like my world, but everything’s different.

Doctor Who
Missy: Your version of good is not absolute.

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Quotes of the Week: May 14-27

These are my favorite quotes from the past two weeks, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

The White Princess
Dowager Queen Elizabeth: What will you say to God when you see him? How will you explain all that blood on your hands?

American Gods
Zorya: You believe in nothing, so you have nothing.

Mr. Wednesday: So you didn’t believe ’til you did, and then the world changed because you believed.

Supergirl
Cat: I can imagine that you’re feeling afraid, and feeling like your world is spinning out of control but believe me, you have a power. And right now, you have a job to do. Resist. Resist these invaders with everything you’ve got. They come with empty promises and closed fists. They promise to make our world great again, and yet they know nothing about the people who make this world great. They think they can con us. And if that doesn’t work, what, they’re going to beat us into submission? They have no idea who they’re up against. Aliens and humans, we need to band together, and we need to stand up and fight back. Everyone needs to be a superhero. Everyone needs to get up and say, ‘Not in my house!’ Let’s prove to these thugs that we are strong, and we’re united, and we are not going to be conquered.

Lucifer
Linda: You’re trying to Parent Trap God and the Divine Goddess?!

Jane the Virgin
Rafael: When I think of family, you’re who I see.

Brockmire
Jim: You ever made eye contact with someone while they stuck a finger farther and farther up your butt? And you don’t know how much more you can handle, but they do?
Joe Buck: I am in the bathroom right now.
Jim: Ah, just answer the question, Joe.
Joe Buck: I was born in Florida. Of course I’ve had a finger in my ass.
Jim: Then you know what it’s like to be in love, Joe Buck.

12 Monkeys
Jones: My friend’s friend is no more trustworthy than my enemy’s enemy.

Jennifer: Okay, egg, listen up. You’re gonna see something weird. Don’t be scared, okay?
Young Jennifer: Okay, chicken.

Jones: No god shall forgive us this sin. Perhaps none should. For that, all we have is each other.

Athan: The history I’ve seen is one of great women sung badly by clumsy men.

Deacon: It’s the beginning.
Jennifer: The beginning of the end.

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Quotes of the Week: November 20-December 3

These are my favorite quotes from the past two weeks, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching. I thought that, with the holiday, I would not have as many. Clearly, I was wrong.

Supergirl
Kara: If I leave you here, Alex will never forgive me.
Jeremiah: Kara, if you die here, there will be no one to forgive.

Kara: You can still be scared while being brave.

Jane the Virgin
Jane: I’m gonna hug you, okay? Just stand still.

Conviction
Hayes: Noble intentions don’t make it okay to withhold information or obscure the truth.

Timeless
Rufus: What’s the point of having a time machine if you can’t fix your regrets?

Lucy: So what are our options? We stay here and fight off the French or die of smallpox eventually?
Rufus: Pretty much.
Wyatt: Likely death either way.
Rufus: Yeah.
Wyatt: What the hell? I’m in.
Lucy: Me too.
Rufus: Tough call for me. I was really hoping to be sold into slavery.

The Flash
Caitlin: Some things you break can’t be put back together.

H.R.: Barry’s real super power isn’t speed, it’s hope.

Barry: I told you I couldn’t do this without you.
Iris: And you’ll never have to.

Joe: Every time I think you’ve run out of ways to show me you’re a hero, you show me another one.

New Girl
Nick: Look at that, Mom, I’m gonna be a hero.
Schmidt: Why are you looking up? Your mother is still alive.
Nick: I’m looking at Chicago.
Schmidt: You think Chicago is up?
Nick: It’s North.

Schmidt: I know who you are and I still love you.

This Is Us
Olivia: How does it feel to be dying?
William: It feels… like all these beautiful pieces of life are flying around me and… I’m trying to catch them. When my granddaughter falls asleep in my lap, I try to catch the feeling of her breathing against me. And when I make my son laugh, I try to catch the sound of him laughing. How it rolls up from his chest. But the pieces are moving faster now, and I can’t catch them all. I can feel them slipping through my fingertips. And soon, where there used to be my granddaughter breathing and my son laughing, there will be… nothing.
Olivia: Oh.
William: I know it feels like you have all the time in the world. But you don’t. So, stop playing it so cool. Catch the moments of your life. Catch them while you’re young and quick. Because sooner than you know it, you’ll be old and slow. And there’ll be no more of them to catch. And when a nice boy who adores you offers you pie, say thank you.

No Tomorrow
Kareema: I can’t believe you’re doing work that isn’t actual work just to try to get a job and have more work.

Mary Anne: I couldn’t decide if I should drink or take a bath, so I’m kinda doin’ both.

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Quotes of the Week: November 13-19

These are my favorite quotes from the past week, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Supergirl
James: This is who I am. I can’t hide behind my camera anymore. If there’s a cost, I’ll pay it.

Lucifer
Jensen: Carbs are the Devil’s spawn, man.
Lucifer: Don’t blame your weaknesses on me!

Timeless
Agent Christopher: When you find Flynn, maybe you can blind him with that suit.
Wyatt: I look like Greg Brady.
Agent Christopher: Well, go find Marcia and Peter and get going.

Mark Felt: All I want is a president who plays by the same rules as everyone else. Now is that too much to ask?

The Flash
Barry: There is no Flash without Iris West.

New Girl
Schmidt: This just proves my theory that if you were a man, you would have a very difficult time getting an erection.
Jess: You have a theory about that?

Schmidt: My wife gave me a fat-man scarf!

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Quotes of the Week: October 23-29

These are my favorite quotes from the past week, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Supergirl
J‘onn: People in this world don’t have much tolerance for others who look different. I say that as an alien, and as someone who’s worn the face of a black man for fifteen years.

Lucifer
Lucifer: Welcome to Devil Time.
Chloe: What are you doing?
Lucifer: Trying out my new catch phrase.
Dan: “Welcome to Devil Time”? What the hell does that mean?
Lucifer: She knows what it means.
Jamie: I have no idea what that means.

Chloe: A couple days ago, I was in a really bad car accident. And I’ve spent the last few days trying to convince everybody that cares about me that it wasn’t a big deal. The truth is, I’m terrified. I’m scared of how it can all just end, with no rhyme or reason. And what I want to do right now is just go home and read a bedtime story to my daughter. But, you know, that’s not up to me either. We can’t control what happens to us, only how it affects us and the choices we make.

Timeless
Ian Fleming: Rufus, there are allies, contacts, and women, but never trust. Only the mission.

Conviction
Hayes: Honestly, Dan, I hope your audience sees through this charade, because this here – Me in these pearls and this stupid suit – this is what privilege looks like.
Dan: Can you elaborate on that?
Hayes: The fact that you’re here talking to me – this is the problem. Rich, famous, powerful people get away with murder all the time, sometimes literally. Coke in the purse, insider trading, sexual assault – you name it. I screw up. Because of my last name, the cops call the DA. He calls my mom. Strings are pulled. I’m out on the street in an hour with a new job – a job I initially had no interest in. Funny thing is, I like causing trouble, busting the system, exposing wrongful convictions. Kind of gets me off. So, really, it worked for me, again. Now, hopefully, it’s also a bonus to people like Penny Price – a mom accused of killing her own son – to have me on their side. Because I may be a hot mess, but I’m a hot mess with privilege. And since Penny Price has none, the least I can do is lend her some of mine.

The West Wing
Senator Marino: It seems to me that more and more we’ve come to expect less and less from each other.

Arrow
Diggle: You broke me out of prison.
Lyla: For better or worse, Johnny.
Diggle: I told you I wanted to stay.
Lyla: And I figured, if you wanted to make your own decisions then you wouldn’t have gotten married.

Evelyn: Things have really fallen apart without Oliver.
Oliver: It’s a good thing I’m back then.
Rory: Was he waiting for an entrance line?
Curtis: No. He’s just that cool.

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Quotes of the Week: October 9-15

These are my favorite quotes from the past week, mostly from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Supergirl
Alex: Your cousin smells terrific.

Clark: Being Kara is just as important as being Supergirl.

Clark: Up, up?
Kara: And away!

Lucifer
Lucifer: Goodness, gracious, great balls of fire.
Chloe: Lucifer.
Lucifer: I mean, I’ve heard of hot pants, but this really brings new meaning to the term “fire crotch,” doesn’t it?
Chloe: Lucifer!
Lucifer: Wait. I have more. Smokey Bobinson. Weekend at Burnie’s.
Ella: His burning bush?
Lucifer: Oh. Very good. That was actually me, by the way, so don’t tell anyone.

Lucifer: I punish because I’m good at it. I love giving people their due. Makes me happy.

Conviction
Hayes: If you don’t want me to sleep with waiters from Mom’s campaign events, don’t hire hot ones.

Hayes: Next time you want to check up on me, find a different spy, because I’m never sleeping with someone already in bed with my mother.

Timeless
Wyatt: An actor.
Lucy: Pretty well-known too. But his brother, Edwin, was literally the most famous actor in America. John never quite measured up.
Rufus: So, this is like if Donnie Wahlberg assassinated the president.
Lucy: Pretty much, actually.

The Flash
Barry: I’ve kissed Iris West twice, and I have managed to erase both times from existence!
Felicity: Yeah, I hate it when that happens.

Felicity: Everybody likes Barry Allen. You’re like pudding. Everybody likes pudding.

Jay: Are you just gonna take a do-over every time you make a mistake? Or will you live with them, and move forward?

Iris: Where ever you go, you’ll always be Barry, and I’ll always be Iris. We always find each other.

New Girl
Jess: You can’t be mad at these people.
Schmidt: But they were all horrible to me, Jess.
Jess: And that’s why you left. You created your own path. You changed cities. You made friends. You found your purpose. You met the love of your life!
Schmidt: I sure did.

The Real O’Neals
Jodi: I’ll make you a deal. I’ll do the modeling gig if you go out with VP Murray on a real date.
Eileen: And why would I do that?
Jodi: Because it’s National Coming Out Day. And if I can come out as someone who’s plus-size, you can come out as someone who’s got a crush on a thin man in Lycra.
Eileen: Of all the fabrics in all the world, he had to wear that one.

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