These are my favorite quotes from the past two weeks, not just from shows currently on the air, but also other random things I happen to be watching.

Masters of Sex
Dr. Farber: Where is the love?
Dr. Masters: In 1687, Sir Isaac Newton discovered what was then known as the Law of Universal Gravitation. Gravity. Take two objects, the larger object exerts an attractive force on the smaller object pulling it towards itself, as it were. An apple falls from the tree. The earth, by far the more massive object, pulls the apple to the ground. Simple enough. Only Newton’s theory left scientists a rather puzzling problem. To paraphrase you, Dr. Farber, where is the gravity? It’s not something you can see or touch. It’s not something you can put under microscopes or examine from a telescope. Well, 230 years after Newton, a German patent clerk in Switzerland *finally* realized that scientists had been asking the wrong question all along. They would never find an object in all the immensity of space called ‘gravity’ because, in point of fact, gravity is nothing but the shape of space itself. That clerk, Einstein, posited that the apple does not fall to the ground because the Earth exerts some mysterious kind of force upon it, the apple falls to the ground because it is following the lines and grooves that gravity has carved into space. And when we talk about sex, we do not talk about love, Dr. Farber, because love cannot be rendered into columns and graphs as if it were the same as blood pressure or heart rate. Love is not a force exerted by one body *onto* another. It is the very fabric of those bodies. Love is that which carves the lines and grooves. The curvature of our desire.

The Last Ship
Ray: These guys are packing some major fire power. They had guns I didn’t know existed. And I play a lot of video games.
Cdr Chandler: Well, we don’t have to worry about that. We’re bringing a Navy ship to a gun fight.

Chasing Life
April: Marriage isn’t about romance. It’s about commitment.
Emma: Commitment *is* romantic.

You’re the Worst
Becca: Jimmy, are you having a good time?
Jimmy: Absolutely. I’m just so glad you invited me.
Becca: Really?
Jimmy: Of course! Sometimes, you just want to witness the beginning of a disaster, so later, when the house is engulfed in flames, you can say, “Yup! I was there when they installed the faulty wiring.”

The Fosters
Callie: The system is broken, sir, badly. And the only people who understand just how bad are the ones without any say, without any voice. Somebody’s gotta speak up.
Judge Ringer: And that someone is going to be you, is it?
Callie: Yes. I’m one of the lucky ones. You know, I… I found an amazing family, and I’m finally safe and loved, like, really, truly loved. And one of the things that I’ve learned from my moms, from watching the way that they live their lives, is that when you’re lucky, it is your job to give something back. And when you see something wrong, to stand up and to say so. So, I’m really sorry if I offended you. It was not my intention. I’m not going to apologize for standing up. Somebody has to.
Judge Ringer: Well, I wish it weren’t the case, but there’s a lot of truth in what you’re saying. It’s no secret the system is failing a lot of kids, and that someone needs to do something about it. I’m proud of you for being that person.

Veep
Amy: She is so good at making people believe she is good with people.

The Astronaut Wives Club
Trudy: The world just became a lot bigger.
Rene: The question is, what’s next?

Killjoys
Johnny: When it rains, it poops.

Bomber: Don’t feel ashamed. It’s not like it’s a fair fight. You’re just a girl. I’m Level 6.
Johnny: I’m Johnny Jaqobis. Stop licking my partner.